Frost*ie Limericks (Now over 1580 Limericks!!)

[Rook]

(we interrupt this limerick to ask a question:  Do you really rhyme twat with hat?  Over here the twat rhymes with hot.  just asking.)  

I would have rhymed it with hot myself, mate. I'm more amused that twat/twot gets debated, but no one blinks at "buttered backside of a cat"  :?

[Mikey]

We interrupt this Limerick to bring you the derail express.
Surprised it's lasted this long :lol:

Change the points

[Rook]

So now why'd you suppose he did that?
Must be mad, other spreads have less fat,
They exercise hard,
Cutting back on the lard,

[rogerg]

So now why'd you suppose he did that?
Must be mad, other spreads have less fat,
They exercise hard,
Cutting back on the lard,
better a buttered-butt cat than a bat!!


This lexicographical stuff

[Rook]

This lexicographical stuff
Is keeping my wit up to snuff

[rogerg]

This lexicographical stuff
Is keeping my wit up to snuff
it's twat or it's not

[Rook]

This lexicographical stuff
Is keeping my wit up to snuff
it's twat or it's not
But other than that,

[sawtooth]

This lexicographical stuff
Is keeping my wit up to snuff
it's twat or it's not
But other than that,
I just couldn't give a gnat's chuff

These late-Summer mornings are chilly,

[Trapezium Artist]

These late-Summer mornings are chilly,
When cycling, they shrivel me silly,



(as this is a family show, I declined to go for the completely obvious, but you may mentally substitute in a couple of y's if it amuses you  8-) )

[RacingHippo]

These late-Summer mornings are chilly,
When cycling, they shrivel me silly,
And my wife says it triples

[Trapezium Artist]

These late-Summer mornings are chilly,
When cycling, they shrivel me silly,
And my wife says it triples,
Like Scaramanga's nipples,

[RacingHippo]

Oi! You said you were keeping it clean!

[Trapezium Artist]

Oi! You said you were keeping it clean!

Oh, c'mon; I made the rule, I can change it - that's the art of management  8-)

And anyway, the irony here is that it's probably the Janet Jackson wardrobe malfunction loons across the ocean (not that everyone across the ocean is a loon, to be clear   ) who'd object to my use of the word "nipple", while they would be completely happy with the other word which I self-censored.
Need I say more?

[Rook]

These late-Summer mornings are chilly,
When cycling, they shrivel me silly,
And my wife says it triples,
Like Scaramanga's nipples,
But my bum is still white as a lilly

What? You started it!

If Godfrey was a bard of yore,

[Mikey]

If Godfrey was a bard of yore,
It wouldn't be prog any more